Two Weeks of Forever
by AverageWitch
Summary: The night started off wonderfully but ended in disaster. What happened during the next two weeks is only known to a few. How did Brennan cope with Booth's 'death?
1. Chapter 1: Disaster

"Where are we going" Dr. Temperance Brennan asked her partner, Special Agent Seeley Booth, as he pulled out of the Jeffersonian parking garage.

"Oh you'll see." He answered cryptically. Brennan sighed because she knew from experience that no matter how often she asked, he wouldn't tell her anything more. She and her partner had just solved a case involving a wannabe singer and an artist who had lost control. The case had wrapped up fairly quickly and as soon as she finished the required paperwork, Booth had grabbed her coat and ushered her out of her office to his SUV. Brennan had protested the entire way but Booth ignored her saying, "Everyone needs to have a little fun sometime."

She had replied, "But I do have fun-" but he cut her off saying,

"Cataloging bones from limbo is not fun, Bones."

And that comment had started an argument that lasted the entire car ride. As Booth pulled into a parking lot, she peered out of the window and finally saw what their destination was. It was the karaoke bar, The Checkerbox that their latest victim had frequented. After a moment of confusion, she remembered the conversation that led her here.

_She and Booth were in her office and he was teasing her about her singing. She retorted, "I used to sing all the time. My mom said I had a great voice. My favorite song was 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.' My mom said that I sang it better than Cyndi Lauper."_

_Booth laughed, "Of course she said that. That's what parents are for, Bones. They tell you stuff like that to make you feel better."_

_Brennan replied, "No, you're wrong. My mom wasn't lying to make me feel better. Both she and my dad agreed that I sang it better." As she saw Booth open his mouth to disagree, she blurted, "I can show you."_

_Booth raised his eyebrow inquistively. "Oh I want to see this. Right now?" _

"_Not right now. I don't have the music or anything." Brennan replied with a slight blush. She couldn't believe she had actually said she could prove it. This wasn't her normal behavior. It seemed like the more time she spent with Booth the more open she became. She still hadn't decided if it was a good thing or not. _

"_So if you had the music, would you sing?" Booth's question brought her back to the conversation. _

"_Yes, I would."_

"_It's settled then." And with that, he strode out of her office. She sat back in her chair, baffled as to what exactly was settled. _

"I see you held up your end of this deal we somehow made." Brennan said with a slight smile.

"You know I wouldn't pass this opportunity up for the world." Booth responded with a smirk. He turned off the engine and they both exited the SUV. Together they walked up to the bar, Booth's hand on her back the entire way. As soon as they walked through the door, they were bombarded by the Squint Squad plus Sweets. Booth had obviously told them what was going to happen and they were all excited to see Brennan let loose.

A man on stage was speaking, "And tonight, ladies and gentlemen, we have a very special guest. Dr. Temperance Brennan will be singing! Let's give her a roud of applause." He stepped away from the microphone as the entire bar erupted in cheers, her friends being the loudest. Brennan prided herself on being fearless but tonight, it seemed like the walk from the table to the stage was too far away. Booth, seeing her apprehension in her face, guided her to the stage saying, "C'mon Bones you know you can do this. We'll all be right here, cheering for you." Brennan turned and smiled in appreciation of his support. She took a deep breath and jumped on stage, the music already playing. She grabbed the microphone and began belting out the lyrics,

_I come home in the morning light  
My mother says when you gonna live your life right  
Oh mother dear we're not the fortunate ones  
And girls they want to have fun  
Oh girls just want to have fun_

Booth was incredibly surprised to find out that Bones really did sing better than Cyndi Lauper. He clapped and cheered as he watched his partner bound around on stage, singing her heart out. Through the haze of music and excitement he heard a woman's voice calling his name.

"Seeley!"

He turned to see Pam Nunan yelling his name while pointing a gun at his partner. He coudn't hear her voice but was able to read her lips.

"I'm doing this for us. For you."

Booth jumped from his seat to stand in front of Brennan as Pam fired the gun. The bullet slammed into his shoulder, pushing him into the stage. Brennan stood in shock as her partner fell at her feet. Panic and the need for action battled for a split second before she realized her partner needed her. She ran to his side screaming, "Booth! Booth!" She frantically looked around to find something to staunch the blood flow. As she pulled a tablecloth from a nearby couple, she saw Pam standing in the back of the bar. Without thinking, Brennan grabbed Booth's sidearm and fired, hitting Pam in the throat. She didn't spare another thought about what she had just done. Her attention was focused soley on Booth and trying to make the blood stop flowing.

"Someone call 911! Now!" She heard Sweets yell in the background. Brennan pressed harder on the wound but to no avail. The wound was a bad one.

"Booth! Don't die on me. You're gonna be alright. Hang in there!" She barely managed to string her words together. She could feel Booth's pulse fading despite her attempts to save him. This couldn't happen. Not to Booth.

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A/N:

This is my first fanfiction so please read and review! Feedback is much appreciated :)


	2. Chapter 2: Aftermath

Day 0: The Aftermath

Brennan paced restlessly up and down the hospital corridor. The past two hours had begun to blur in her mind. She knew the paramedics had arrived soon enough after the shooting. The medics had been forced to drag her away from Booth's body. Rationally, she knew they would do a much better job at saving his life but her panic had overwhelmed her. The worst part was that the medics had refused to allow her to ride in the ambulance with her partner. She begged and pleaded but she went ignored. The ambulance rushed off, leaving her behind. Angela immediately offered her a ride to the hospital, one she accepted readily. However, by the time they arrived, Booth was already undergoing surgery and she couldn't visit until he was stable. That had been an hour ago.

Now that the danger had passed somewhat and she had calmed down, Brennan's rational side was showing itself. She knew that Booth's injury would not be fatal because of how quickly he had received aid. That did not stop her from worrying though.

"Bren?"

She looked up to see Angela and Hodgins standing in front of her. Angela was holding out a cup of coffee.

"Hey guys." She said wearily. "Is that for me?" She asked pointing toward the cup.

"Yeah it is." Angela replied. "I noticed that you haven't left this hallway in several hours so I wanted to help you out."

"Thanks for thinking of me." Brennan answered, taking the cup of coffee from her best friend. She knew that coffee of all things wouldn't calm her down but it at least gave her something to focus on. Suddenly realizing something, she asked her friends, "What happened to Pam? Did I kill her?" Her face twisted in a grimace.

Hodgins replied, "Yeah you did. It was a quick death. You're a really good shot, you know." While feeling better with the fact that Pam could never come near Booth again, Brennan struggled to deal with the reality of her second killing. She knew it was in self-defense, so she couldn't be charged but it still nagged her. Pushing it away to focus on the current situation, she asked Angela if she had heard anything from the doctors about Booth.

"Sorry sweetie but no one has. Not since he went into surgery." Angela said with despair. She was already fearing for the loss of Booth but she couldn't imagine what Brennan was feeling now. Their silent reflections were interrupted by a doctor coming out of the double doors.

"Dr. Brennan?"

"That's me," Brennan said, stepping forward to talk with the man.

"I have some bad news." The words hit Brennan like a slap to the face. She threw rational thought to the wind.

"What do you mean, 'bad news'? Booth's injury wasn't fatal! He received the proper aid. He has to be alright. He has to." She muttered that last line under her breath as Angela hugged her from the side.

"Despite the fact that aid was administered to Agent Booth's wound, the blood loss was too severe. We tried to stabilize him during surgery, but it was too late." The doctor continued to speak, even though she had stopped responding to his words.

Brennan collapsed into sobs, Angela's arms around her. She couldn't believe it. Her partner couldn't be dead. He had survived through so much already. Surely a simple bullet couldn't kill him? Angela was joined by Hodgins as they tried to comfort their friend. Brennan couldn't breathe. Every gasp ended with a sob. Tears were streaming down her face, so fast that she couldn't have stopped them if she wanted to.

"Oh sweetie it's gonna be alright. We'll get through this together." Angela murmured sympathies in her ear. When Brennan's cries didn't falter, she exchanged a panicked look with Hodgins. She had never seen her friend lose control like this. Angela herself had tears in her eyes but she wanted to stay strong for Brennan.

"Hodgins, call everyone and let them know what's going on. I'm going to take Bren home." Angela's words came out in a strong voice, despite her tears and inner sadness. Hodgins nodded and helped her stand Brennan up.

"Take care of her, okay?" He called after Angela as she and Bren walked to the exit doors.

"I will." Angela replied over her shoulder. She put any thought of Booth out of her mind as she guided Brennan to her car. Angela needed to focus on helping her friend as best as she could. Brennan had already lost so much in her life, Angela wasn't sure if she could recover from another emotional blow.

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A/N:

Hey guys! Sorry for the short chapter. They'll get longer, I promise :)

Read and review please!


	3. Chapter 3: Day 1

Day 1: Friday, the Full Impact

Brennan woke to the sun shining brightly through her window. She groaned in protest, not wanting her sleep to end. She glanced at her clock and was shocked to read 9:17 AM on the face. She jumped out of bed, grumbling. "How did I manage to sleep in? I'm going to be late for work. Booth said-" and with that, she realized exactly why she was still in the bed at nine am. Booth died last night. The realization struck her like a blow and she fell hard to her knees. Angela burst in, "Oh sweetie are you okay? I heard you fall."

Brennan didn't have the strength to reply as sobs racked her frame. Angela immediately ran to Bren as she tried to comfort her friend.

"Sweetie, it's alright. You'll be fine."

She repeatedly murmured as she rocked Brennan slowly. Brennan couldn't believe how lost she felt. Although Booth had only been a part of her life for a short time, he had burrowed under her protective walls and refused to leave. He exasperated her to no end with his Alpha-male tendencies and his adamant belief in the powers of his 'gut feelings'. However, she came to enjoy their discussions, the lunches at the Royal Diner, the nights of paperwork that didn't seem so long anymore. He was a constant presence in her life, and she appreciated it.

Even as she cried, she began to compartmentalize. She hated losing control and was anxious to reign in her emotions. Angela somehow sensed what she was doing and said, "Sweetie, you have to let this out. It'll get better in time but until then, you can't just ignore your emotions."

Brennan took a deep breath and replied, "Yes, I can." She angrily wiped her tears away and abruptly stood. "I did just fine before Booth barged into my life. It shouldn't be hard to go back to how it was."

Angela was still sitting on the floor, looking up at her best friend with concerned eyes. "Sweetie that's not healthy. You have to deal."

"I am dealing, thank you. I'm dealing in my own way." And with that, she turned away and walked stiffly to the kitchen, calling over her shoulder, "Thanks for staying the night but I'm fine now. You can go on home." Angela gasped at the cold tone she heard in her best friend's words. She knew that this was her only chance to stop the walls from coming back up.

"Brennan, come on now. I know you. You can't just block out the world again." As she spoke, she walked toward her friend who was standing at the kitchen window. "Sweetie, look at me." Angela knew better than to touch Bren and thankfully she turned slowly. "I was friends with Booth too, y'know. I'm missing him too. You're not the only one that's hurting here." Angela's voice wavered she finished speaking. Brennan didn't respond. She just stared at a spot above Ange's head, tapping her foot impatiently. Angela sighed, knowing she wouldn't be able to get through the newly erected barriers.

"I'll just see you around, okay? Stay safe." Angela reluctantly left her best friend to her thoughts.

As soon as Brennan heard the door close softly behind Angela, she dropped the 'I'm completely unaffected' facade. Despite her attempts to block out Angela's words, she understood what her best friend was saying. Deep down, she knew it was true but she didn't want to admit it. She didn't want to care about how her friends were hurting. Opening her heart to friendships only costs her in the end. She had been let down and abandoned far too many times. Each time, she told herself she would learn from the experience. Yet, after time, she found herself letting down her walls again. This was one aspect of her life she could not rationalize. She knew the scientific explanation for emotions, for love. Except Booth-

Even in her thoughts, she stumbled over his name. Booth was the one to teach her about real emotions. He showed her how to love, how to connect to people. She would always be grateful for that. Brennan walked aimlessly around her apartment. Everything she saw reminded her of her lost partner. The Foreigner's CD that they had danced to. Empty Thai takeout boxes on the coffee table in the living room were becoming a regular decoration. She usually kept her apartment in perfect condition but they had recently had an influx of cases, big and small, so cleaning had been pushed to the end of the priority list.

With a sigh, Brennan began the slow process of cleaning, figuratively and literally. With every reminder of Booth she picked up, she put another memory of him inside a box in her mind. Several hours later, her apartment was again spotless and her tears had stopped falling. She felt like a functioning human being now. The panicked, out of control Brennan had been forgotten and in her place stood Dr. Temperance Brennan, an untouchable rock.

Brennan surveyed her apartment from her place at the bar in the kitchen. She felt oddly satisfied with the transition she had made, both in her home and in her mind. Looking around, you wouldn't be able to tell that there was once a man who had practically lived there. As she cleaned, she found more reminders of Booth than she thought possible. In the refrigerator, she found take out boxes marked with his name. Assorted notes and papers in his handwriting were scattered in the living room.

She sighed as she began making dinner for herself. Just as she was about to stir-fry her vegetables, her cell phone rang.

"Brennan."

"Hey sweetie it's me, Angela. I just wanted to check up on you… See how you were holding up."

"Hi Angela. I'm fine and I'm holding up well. How are you?"

"Honestly? I'm struggling. I'm staying with Hodgins for now because I didn't want to be alone." Angela paused for a moment. "Are you okay with being alone? Because if not-"

Brennan stopped her friend off with a firm answer. "It's alright, Ange. I'd rather be alone right now. You stay with Hodgins."

"If that's what you want, then." Despite her agreement, Angela sounded uncertain about the situation. Brennan heard her friend's reluctance and quickly reassured her.

"Really, Angela. I'm fine staying by myself. Once I get back to work everything will fall back into place."

"Sweetie," Angela's voice took on a slight chiding tone. "Things are just going to fall back into place. You just lost your best friend. The one person that was-"

"Angela believe me, I know. However, I'm not letting my emotions rule. I told you that earlier today, remember?"

"Yeah, unfortunately I do." Angela exhaled slowly. "Wait a second. Did you say that you're going back to work?"

Brennan, confusion colouring her voice, replied. "Of course I am. Why wouldn't I?"

"When do you plan on returning?"

"I'm going in tomorrow as usual. Again, I'm going to ask why, Ange?"

"What do you mean, why? I should be the one asking that question!" Angela's tone was raised in anger. "Why are you going back to work so soon? Haven't you heard about a little thing called a vacation? Or a break? Or hell, even leave. Take your pick Bren. Just make sure you pick one and don't come into work."

The emotional side of Brennan understood where her friend was coming from, but that side had been replaced by rational thought. Rationally, there was no reason for her not to return to work. If only to stop the memories from rising in her mind.

"Angela. I understand what you're saying but taking leave, a break or even going on vacation is not what I need right now. What I need to do is go back to work. I'm not like you." Brennan felt tears form in her eyes for no apparent reason. "I can't take a break right now. My job is what I need right now. If you need to take a vacation, by all means go. I'm not stopping you." Not hearing an immediate response, Brennan suddenly realized that she might have hurt Angela even more. However, Dr. Temperance Brennan did not apologize to people for speaking the truth. And for Brennan, the truth was the only thing that had never failed her in the past.

"Brennan." Angela sounded like she was crying. "I'm sorry for pushing you. My emotions are all over the place right now. I know you. This is how you cope. I get that now." She took a hiccuping breath. "I guess I just wish I could change your mind. That's all."

"I'm not going to change. Ever. I'm a scientist, Angela. But I accept your apology."

"Yeah, okay then. Well I've got to go. I'll see you whenever I come back to work."

They exchanged goodbyes and Brennan ended the call. Angela's words had rattled her. She and Booth were the only two people who could affect Brennan like that. For the second time that day, Brennan found herself trying to forget her best friend's words but they kept spinning in her mind. Angela was right in all her points. Booth had been her best friend and despite her compartmentalizing abilities, she wouldn't be recovering from that loss anytime soon. The easiest thing for Brennan to do would be to dive head first into her work. Her first love always does a wonderful job of cheering her up on bad days. And she knew, she had a lot of bad days ahead of her.

* * *

A/N:

Hey guys! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Look out for the next one in a day or so :)

Read and review, please!

Thanks for reading

P.S.

Here's my disclaimer: I don't own it. Wish I did


	4. Chapter 4: Day 2

A/N:

Hey guys! I hope you enjoy this chapter and thanks for reading :) Please drop a review my way. It'd be greatly appreciated

Disclaimer: If you recognize it, I don't own it

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Day 2: Saturday, the Simple Reminders

Dr. Temperance Brennan awoke feeling like her old self. The person she was before…Well, just before. She kept herself focused on the tasks in front of her. Breakfast was her usual cup of coffee with two sugars and she managed to leave her apartment earlier than usual. She was one of the first of her team to arrive at the Jeffersonian. She wasn't surprised. It had only been two days since… the Incident and she knew that the others wouldn't be able to cope as well as herself. The lab, while usually bustling with noise and activity was strangely quiet. It was disconcerting because she knew few employees would have heard the news already. And most of them hadn't even spoken once to her partner in the past. He had only worked and interacted with herself and her squints, as he coined them.

Brennan settled into her office chair, arranging papers in a certain order as a distraction. Her mask was in place until she glanced at her computer and saw Jasper the pig sitting next to it. She gasped involuntarily at the sudden reminder of what was missing in her life. In a fit of anger, she grabbed the pig and threw him against the glass windows of her office. Despite the strength of the impact, Jasper landed in one piece on her floor. Brennan sighed as she realized someone was standing in her doorway. It was Cam.

"Um, good morning Dr. Brennan." She sounded unsure of herself for once. Brennan decided to help her almost-friend out and replied, "Good morning Dr. Saroyan. How are you?"

"I'm…" Cam paused as she searched for the right words. "I'll be fine. How are you?"

"I'm fine, thank you." Brennan was uncomfortable with discussing her feelings with her boss and so moved hurriedly to the next topic. "Is there anything specific you want me to work on?"

"No, not today." Cam replied slowly.

"Alright then. I'll just catalog remains from limbo then." Brennan said matter of factly.

Cam seemed surprised at her calm, unaffected tone. "Yeah that would be fine with me. I just stopped by to grab some things from my office. You're not going to see much of me this week. Or Angela and Hodgins, no doubt. It's understandable though. I didn't even have to encourage them to take off. Don't you want to take a vacation too?" Cam tilted her head slightly as she observed Dr. Brennan.

Brennan showed no emotion, however as she replied, "No, I would much rather work right now." Cam sighed as she turned to exit but hesitated before completely leaving. Brennan saw this and commented on it.

"Did you want anything else?"

Cam again seemed loss for words. "No not really. I just wanted to let you know that Sweets is making himself available-"

Brennan, sensing where this conversation was going, ended it quickly by saying, "Thanks but I'm fine. I don't need to talk to a psychologist, or anyone really." She added as an afterthought. Cam simply nodded her head in agreement and fled Brennan's coldly polite presence.

oOo

Brennan's first day of working without Booth went fairly well. She hid herself in limbo most of the day, forgetting everyone in the lab plus, both lunch and dinner. She glanced at her watch and was shocked to see it read 7:08 pm. She hadn't meant to stay in limbo all day but it worked out well in the end. Her stomach grumbled loudly and she realized she hadn't eaten since that morning. _He _was always around to remind her to eat or to bring her take out if she was swamped. Brennan sighed softly.

"Even the little things remind me of you. How am I going to live like this?" She muttered to herself as she boxed up several body parts. Again, her mind began providing logical arguments for her emotions but for once, she shut the small voice out. She put her hands on the examination table and simply breathed in and out for several long minutes. It was only the second day and already her mask was unsteady. She hadn't felt the need to wear it in so long. She had forgotten just how hard it was to maintain it.

As she struggled for control, she cast her mind back to her teenage years in the foster system. Although she had stayed in the same area while in the system, it hadn't helped much in terms of making friends. She was still the outsider, the freak in her high school. In those days, her mask was her only way of surviving. Every day she was ridiculed in the school hallways. She was forced to eat alone during lunch, and always sat in the back of the classrooms. She didn't speak up unless the teacher called on her. While she knew the levels of her intelligence then, she didn't want to give her peers another reason to mock her.

However, as Brennan leaned on the examination table, she understood that things had changed. No longer was she the outsider of the group. She was the leader of one of the best crime-solving teams in the country. She had made something of herself since high school. Logically, that meant that she wouldn't have to rely on her mask for support. Circumstances dictated differently though. She best dealt with loss through work. Every time a relationship ended, she would cope by flying halfway across the world for anthropology digs. She was sorely tempted to accept an offer in Brazil to identify newly discovered remains but she knew she couldn't leave her best friend. Not right now, at least.

Her cell phone ringing interrupted Brennan's thoughts. She jumped at the sudden intrusion, fumbling to find her phone in her pockets. She flipped it open.

"Brennan."

"Hey sweetie it's Ange. Where are you?" Brennan didn't want to worry Angela but neither was she comfortable with lying. She sighed as she said, "I'm in limbo. Why?"

"Bren, do you know what time it is?"

"No, I don't."

"It's almost 9 pm. You've been down there since this morning. You need to go on home and get some rest."

Brennan almost gasped as she heard the time. It seemed like only moments ago she was checking her watch but in reality, it had been two hours.

"I hadn't realized it was so late, Ange. Thanks for reminding me." Brennan's voice was even, bordering on coldly polite. Angela heard this and inwardly sighed, knowing this was her friend's way of dealing.

"Just… Make sure you go home at a decent time, okay? Do that for me."

Brennan reluctantly agreed and hung up the phone. She didn't want to go home. Everywhere she went, there were reminders. Reminders of her past life, of what she lost. She also knew that as soon as she even tried to sleep, the nightmares would begin.

oOo

She slowly packed up her last set off remains. It was a teenager, female who lived approximately five hundred years ago. The girl had been pregnant at least once, despite her young age. It was in moments like these when Brennan wished she could create a story like Dr. Goodman could. She only disapproved of conjecture during murder cases. The bones she repacked told a story of times past. The only voice the girl had left to her. Brennan walked pensively up to the lab's lounge in the balcony. She stood above her beloved home and simply _looked_.

She didn't see much activity because of the late hour. However there were certain scientists still squinting away at their work. She saw the guards making their rounds. She could see her office from her vantage point. The blinds were closed and the door shut. Something about the darkness of her office struck a chord within her. She knew exactly what Dr. Sweets would say about her observation. That her dark office represented her life currently. That she had shut off her emotions and all that was left was a shell. But Brennan never put much stock into psychology. She sighed as she turned to walk down the stairs, knowing she had delayed her leaving long enough. She was surprised that Angela hadn't called again to 'check up' on her. Brennan loved her friend dearly but she hated to be treated like a child, especially a sick child. That's how she felt, she realized. Or at least, that was how everyone saw her, she reasoned.

On some level, she appreciated their concern for her, but she was overwhelmed by the pressure they inadvertently pushed on her. They expected her to break down any minute. Perhaps to enter into a catatonic state when the full impact of Booth's death hit her. She had hoped that by now, her friends and colleagues would know her better than that. Recovering from the loss of her partner and best friend would be hard, yes. But not impossible. She was determined to continue living her life like she used to.


	5. Chapter 5: Day 3

A/N:

Hey guys! Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoy this chapter :) Don't forget to read and review please! Any feedback is greatly appreciated

Disclaimer: If I owned it, season 6 would be WAY different :p

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Day 3: Sunday, the Sweet Oblivion

_It was dark. Brennan didn't know where she was but she was frozen in utter terror. She opened her mouth to scream but there was no air to breathe. She was in her car, buried alive, dying slowly from lack of oxygen. As she struggled for her next breath, she heard laughing from above her. Heather Taffet was standing next to Howard Epps above her grave. Brennan's two greatest enemies. As her vision began to go black around the edges, she heard Taffet's voice, mocking. "Your agent can't save you. We got to him first. You should have known he wouldn't stay with you.." Her voice is lost as Brennan loses consciousness._

_She awakes again, unfortunately into another nightmare. She's sitting in the witness box in a court, speaking words she had no control over._

"_Yes, Agent Booth brutally tortured and murdered this victim. In cold blood, too. Howard Epps was surrendering; he was unarmed. Booth never paused in his actions. He beat Epps for hours. It was horrible. I would've stopped him but he threatened to kill me too if I tried anything. It was pure luck that Agent Kenton found us."_

_Brennan was horrified by what she was saying. This couldn't be true! Kenton was a dirty, conniving scumbag who tried to kill her. Not Booth! He would never hurt her. She struggled to stand up from the witness box but suddenly her hands were handcuffed to the chair she was sitting in. The scenery changed for a third time. _

_This was the worst. No longer was she being buried alive, or forced to witness against her partner. No, this time she was the accused and guilty person. Part of her mind realized that it was a nightmare but the other half of her mind accepted her guilt. Brennan looked up from her handcuffed arms and legs to see Booth and her friends standing in front of her. Slowly, they all stepped forward to deliver the verdict. _

_GUILTY_

"NO!" She jerked to a sitting position in her bed, breathing heavily and sweating profusely. Wild eyes roved the dark room as she battled the urge to scream a second time. As she attempted to calm herself, her immediate surroundings registered in her mind. She was in her bedroom. Safe and sound. She tried to remember her nightmare but the details were slipping the longer she was awake. She felt a mixture of gratefulness and fear. She was glad she couldn't remember but feared what would happen if she fell asleep again.

Brennan glanced at the clock on her bedside table. It was only 3 am. Rationally she knew it was too early to be doing anything but sleeping but her panicked state won the argument. She knew she wouldn't be getting anymore sleep so she began to prepare for work. She arrived at the lab by 4:15 am. The night security guard seemed surprised to see her at the late hour. This was the earliest she had ever clocked in.

"Well hi there Dr. Brennan. What are you doing here?"

As Brennan signed in, she flicked her eyes to the guard's shirt to read his name.

"Hello Tom. I'm here because I can't sleep right now. I figure I could do something productive with my time instead of wasting it at home."

"While I understand what you're saying, that wasn't quite what I meant." Tom seemed unsure of himself, as if he knew he was about to cross an invisible boundary. "I heard about what happened to your partner. And I just wanted to give you my condolences-"

"Thank you, Tom but it's not necessary." Brennan leveled a glare in his direction as she picked her bag up to walk into the Jeffersonian.

"Oh. Alright then."

She stalked passed him angrily. She knew he was simply being polite by offering his sympathies but it was the last thing she wanted to hear at the moment. It didn't matter if she was awake or sleeping, she couldn't escape the memory of her partner in the slightest.

She hadn't had nightmares of this intensity since the Gravedigger had kidnapped her and Hodgins. However things had changed. Then, she had Booth to call in the middle of the night and he would come over and just sit with her. She didn't have that luxury now. So she did what she knew best: identified remains.

oOo

As she worked, she tried to compartmentalize, something she was an expert in. It was a skill that allowed her to focus on her work without useless emotions and memories getting in the way. It had worked well in the past but she was having a hard time with it now. She paused as an understanding bloomed in her mind. In the past two days, she had divided her mind into the past and present. The past being her time with… _him_. She couldn't function like this. Her mind and heart were broken. She believed beyond repair.

"How could this happen to me?" She wondered to herself. Silence met her query. Silence was the only answer she had been getting since the Incident. Brennan pulled her knees up under her chin as she rocked slowly on her bed. It had been 52 hours and 3 minutes since Booth died. She had been keeping track of the hours in the back of her mind. It was a habit she fell into after her parents had disappeared. As much as she didn't want to think about Booth, her unruly emotions would not let her forget him.

oOo

Brennan was boxing up her tenth set of newly-identified remains when the phone call came at 10 am. According to the agent on the other line, a body had been found in an alley and the FBI needed her to identify the victim. While Brennan was fine with working at the Jeffersonian so soon, she did not feel ready to begin case work like this. It was too soon.

"Why are you calling me? Doesn't the FBI have its own forensic team?"

The agent who had introduced himself as Agent Foster, replied. "Yes, we do but the bureau knows that you're the best in the field. We really need you now."

"Well yes, I am the best in my field. However I am unavailable for case work at this present time."

"Dr. Brennan, it's not casework. It's an easy indentify-and-move-on case. You're not required to do anything beyond that."

She hesitated in her answer. Getting out of the lab would be good for her, according to her friends. But crime scene work was only done with Booth by her side. She breathed in deeply and made her decision. She would view this as a test to see if she could still fully function without her partner.

"Fine. I'll come and identify the remains."

"Great! I'll come by and pick you up."

Agent Foster ended the call before she could respond. Who did this agent think he was? Brennan was transported back to when she first worked with Booth and she thought all agents were arrogant morons who ordered people around. Booth had broken that expectation, but he seemed to be one of the few decent agents in the bureau. Feeling trapped but not being able to change a thing, she strode angrily to her office to pick up her field supply bag.

oOo

Ten minutes later she was in the passenger seat of an SUV heading to the crime scene. Agent Foster was staring at her and it was making Brennan rather uncomfortable. She had no idea why he was chosen to re-recruit her but did not linger on the thought. Physically, he was similar to Booth: tall with broad shoulders and short black hair. However, Foster's eyes were different. They were a brilliant shade of green that drew Brennan's attention.

"So."

Agent Foster's simple statement confused her.

"So what?" She replied.

"So I asked to be the one who picked you up today." Hearing this made Brennan's eyes narrow suspiciously.

"Why?" Inwardly she hoped that they would arrive at the crime scene shortly because she wanted _out_ of this conversation.

"Why? Why not?" He laughed. "All of the agents in the bureau have been so jealous of Booth in the past years. He's the best agent, gets an office and on top of it all, he gets a hot scientist lady as a partner."

Brennan bristled indignantly at hearing this egotistic, contemptuousman speak so glibly of her deceased partner. Thankfully they arrived at the scene just as he finished speaking and it gave her a moment to compose her retort. She jumped out of the SUV and stalked to his side of the car. He never saw her coming. She punched him hard across his jaw with all her strength.

"Don't you dare talk about Booth that way. He deserved all of the recognition he received." Agent Foster leaned against the car rubbing his jaw slowly. Fear was in his eyes as he listened to what Brennan had to say. "Tell the other agents, and your boss, that I will _never_ work with any other FBI agent again. This is the last time." Her words were spoken in a low, fierce tone that would've scared anyone who had good sense. Unfortunately for Agent Foster, he didn't.

Foster pushed himself off the side of the car with a smug air. "So you really think you could just declare that you're not working with anyone and it would just happen? God, no wonder Booth died. He probably didn't want to be around you any longer."

Brennan was usually proud of her self-control abilities… Except for when it concerned her partner. Brennan froze in anger and leveled an intense glare at Foster as he taunted her. She calculated the distance between them quickly. If she moved fast, she could probably incapacitate him in a few moves. Foster interpreted her inaction as submission and so, thinking he had won, laughed in her face. Brennan's self-control snapped in an instant. She kicked Foster in his chest, hard enough to knock him to the ground. The FBI team at the crime scene had witnessed everything and most were not surprised to see Brennan retaliating with a physical response.

Foster rose quickly to his feet. "Is that all you got? You're just a scientist. You don't belong in the field. Surely you should've learned that by now." His words stung Brennan but she never lost her concentration. She was able to block the punch he threw to her gut and counter with a knee to the groin and an elbow on his back to knock him to the ground again. He rolled on the ground, groaning. Brennan glared in contempt at him as she gathered her things from his SUV and began walking toward the crime scene.

"What do we have?" She called out to anyone who would answer.

"Wow that was awesome Dr. Brennan," a man said to her. "He needed to be taken down a few pegs. I think you accomplished that." He chuckled as he answered her query. "Well in regards to what we have, my team isn't really sure. That's why we called you in."

"If I had known Hacker had chosen Foster to pick you up, I would've done it myself." The speaker was another FBI agent that she didn't recognize. He could sense her uncertainty, so he introduced himself. "Hey, sorry I didn't mean to be rude. I'm Agent Lawrence. I was friends with Booth. And I just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss."

Brennan was taken aback by the sincerity she could hear in his voice. "Oh, thank you. Now, if you don't mind, I'd like to examine the body."

"Oh of course." He pointed to a hole about ten feet away. "We found the body there. Or at least, what we think is a body. It's all… Well, you'll see what I mean."

Brennan's curiosity was piqued and she was anxious to discover just what had everyone so flummoxed. She walked to the edge of the hole and realized why everyone was so stumped. It was a body, that was for sure. However, there were some additions.

"The victim was male, between the ages of 20 to 28." As she spoke, Agent Lawrence took notes on his pad.

"Do you have an answer for the.." He gestured in confusion. Brennan stared at the body as she contemplated her answer. What was so strange about the body were the wing-like bones extending from the victim's shoulders. If she wasn't a scientist at heart, she would've said the victim had wings like an angel. However she knew that couldn't be true.

The rest of her examination went smoothly, once she assured the forensic team that the additions were surgical and that the victim was not an angel, but simply a man who clearly had a mental issue. By the time she finished the preliminaries, Agent Foster had unfortunately fully recovered from Brennan's attack. Employing his newly found common sense, he kept his mouth tightly shut, obviously not wanting to risk angering her again. If she believed in God, she would have thanked him profusely. Agent Lawrence offered her a ride back to the lab, one she accepted gratefully. Being out in the field was nice, but it didn't feel the same. Booth had been her connection to the people around her and to the victim's family. Not having him by her side gave her a strange, detached feeling.

oOo

Brennan spent the rest of the day cataloging bones from limbo and ignoring the phone calls from Angela and Sweets. She didn't feel like talking to either of them right then. Deciding to head out early, Brennan clocked out of the Jeffersonian at dinner time. Having proved to herself she could handle being in the field, she thought a stop by the Royal Diner for tonight's dinner would serve as a nice "reward". The diner was another place she had been avoiding the past few days. She walked through the doors and felt a smile coming to her face. The diner was one place that stayed unchanged. She sat at her usual table and ordered a small Caesar salad. The waitress serving her commented, "I see you're by yourself tonight. Bad case?"

Brennan was slightly disconcerted by the question but answered, "No, no case today. Just a really, really long weekend." She could tell that she hadn't erased all her emotion from her response as the waitress's smile dimmed. She patted Brennan on the shoulder as she walked away. Brennan relaxed in her chair and brought up all her memories of her and Booth in this small diner. They practically lived her during cases, which was most of the time. It was close enough to walk to the Jeffersonian so even the other employees came by for lunch sometimes. She didn't acknowledge the waitress when she sat her salad down gently in front of the scientist. Brennan was staring out of the window, lost in her thoughts and memories.


	6. Chapter 6: Day 4

Disclaimer: Don't own anything you recognize

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Day 4: Monday, the Musings of Psychologists

Brennan jerked awake for the fourth time. "God it's only 6am," she muttered to herself as she began preparing for work. Her sleep had been plagued with nightmares and so the few hours of shut-eye she managed to get were not restful in the slightest. As she flowed through her usual morning routine, she reflected on the events of yesterday. It felt refreshing to go out into the field, even though it hadn't been a full week since the Incident. She did not, however, like working with a new FBI agent. Agent Lawrence seemed like a decent man to her, but he was definitely no Booth.

She walked out to her car, shivering in the chilly March air. She drove slowly to the Jeffersonian, for once feeling apprehensive about going to work. She hated it. For her, the lab was a safe haven. It was her home; the place where everything added together, where everything made sense. She had grown comfortable with interacting with people outside of the lab but she had also grown dependent on Booth's calming presence. Brennan prided herself on being in control and independent and Booth accepted that. He still had his Alpha-male moments but she became accustomed to them.

Brennan parked in her usual spot in the Jeffersonian garage and trekked up the two flights of stairs to the lab. She greeted Tom, the night guard as she clocked in.

"Why, hello there again. It's good to see you coming in later than last time." Tom shot her a teasing grin. Brennan, seeing the smile on the elderly man's face, couldn't resist returning it.

"Beautiful smile you got there, missy. People should see it more often."

Blushing slightly, Brennan thanked him as she strode to her office. Before she entered, something caught her eye in her window. It was a post-it note from Zack.

_Dr. Brennan, _

_I can only assume that you will be coming in early, as usual so I wanted to tell you that I am already here. If I'm not on the platform then I will be down in Limbo._

Brennan plucked the note off the glass as she entered her office. It was good to know that Zack was one person who hadn't changed in his interactions with her. Like herself, Zack was one of the few scientists who clocked in odd hours such as this. She settled into her desk chair and started up her computer. Zack always sent her his reports through email and she wanted to see what kind of work he had completed already. However, she was surprised to see an email from Sweets as well. He requested to meet with her later the afternoon for an evaluation. Glancing around to make sure she was indeed alone, Brennan allowed herself to drop the mask for a moment. She rested her head on her keyboard and sighed in frustration. The last thing she wanted to do was meet with Sweets. She had studiously avoided him the last few days and wanted to keep it that way. Brennan already had a small Sweets-voice in her mind, she did not want to hear it in real life as well. Unfortunately Brennan knew she had no choice but to comply with his wishes. If she refused the evaluation, it would arouse suspicion and Dr. Saroyan might force her to take a vacation. A real one at that, because usually Brennan spent her "vacations" in third-world countries identifying remains. Dreading the upcoming meeting, Brennan typed out a quick reply to the young psychologist.

oOo

As she headed down to Limbo to meet with Zack, she wondered how Sweets was dealing with Booth's death. He of all people should be able to cope the best. At least, that's what she assumed to be true. Down in Limbo, Zack updated her on his work.

"Good morning Dr. Brennan."

"Morning Zack. What have you done so far?"

"Well, I have identified and cataloged seven sets of remains. They were all World War I victims and fairly easy. Three of the remains were men, aged 18-25, which is congruent with the ages of men who fought in that time. Of those three, one of the men was probably an automatic shooter of some sort. The bone markings indicated stenosing tenosynovitis. The other four remains that I identified were men, all in their late thirties. It looks as if they spent a lot of time carrying heavy objects. I can only assume that they were part of a supply corps of some sort. Would you like to see the bones yourself?"

"No, not right now. Send me a report though, when you finish completely. I would like to get to work, if you don't mind." Despite being Brennan's favorite grad student, she enjoyed working alone best. Those were the times the bones spoke to her. Metaphorically speaking of course, because the bones were dead and physically incapable of holding a conversation.

oOo

To an outsider, someone who either did not know Brennan or was unfamiliar with her line of work, it would appear as if Dr. Temperance Brennan, best-selling author and world renowned forensic anthropologist, was conversing with a set of bones named Booth. However, to one who knew the underlying issues, would know the truth. Brennan barely realized she was speaking aloud. Her thoughts had been building and breaking in her mind all day; she could not control them any longer.

"The victim is male, approximately 6'1, and well-muscled. Just like you, Booth. And just like you, this person ends up like bones on my examination table. Not that I plan to examine you anytime soon. Although perhaps that would be a good idea… perhaps those ignorant doctors at the hospital missed something that could've saved your life. Why did you protect me? You knew I would have gladly taken that bullet. It was meant for me… That's something I didn't realize at first." She never paused in her examination of the remains as she spoke. Compartmentalizing was good for something after all.

"We're quite a pair, aren't we? Or… we were. Until you just had to give into your Alpha-male tendencies and save my life. Not that I'm not appreciative. I am. However, I wish it did not come at the cost of your own life." Brennan breathed in deeply before continuing her 'conversation'. She had no rational reason for voicing her thoughts to a set of bones that could never answer her back. No, only one person could answer these particular questions. And that person was forever lost to her.

"We're both extremely willing to die for each other, to kill in protection of the other. Until I met you, I never thought I would feel that way about someone."

"Feel what way, exactly?" A strong, heavily accented voice broke through her musings. She looked up abruptly and almost dropped the tibia she was examining.

"Gordon Gordon!" she exclaimed. "What are you doing here?"

"Well, I heard about Agent Booth and I wanted to express how terribly sorry I am. He will be missed dearly." Usually she responded to condolences with a curt reply, however this time she found herself at a loss for words. She knew that Gordon Gordon truly cared for Booth and that he will indeed miss the agent. So she gave him a half-smile in return.

"Thanks, Gordon Gordon." She put down the bone, walked to the psychologist-turned-chef and enveloped him in a strong hug. After a long moment, they parted and Gordon pretended to not notice the tears glistening in Brennan's eyes.

"Well then dear, back to my original question. What did you think you would never feel for someone?"

Brennan strongly disliked psychology, but she had a soft spot for the British chef. She would much rather answer him than Sweets.

"It's… hard to explain." She opened her mouth to continue but no words emerged.

"It's good that I have plenty of time, then." He replied with a small smile. "How about we get some lunch? I doubt you've eaten all day."

Although he was right, Brennan's pride would not let her admit that aloud. She simply nodded and told him that she had to pack up the bones she was examining, and then she'd be ready for lunch.

"I'll just wait up in your office, if that's alright."

She assured him that it was, and he turned to leave, throwing a reminder to not forget about him over his shoulder. She chuckled, for the first time since Booth's death. Gordon Gordon always had a way of cheering her up, and he was invaluable with his advice and insight into her life and partnership. What started out as a dreary day, turned slightly brighter as she cleaned up for lunch.

oOo

Predictably, Gordon treated Brennan to a fabulous lunch at the Royal Diner. As they walked through the familiar doors, Brennan shied away from sitting at their normal table by the window. Gordon simply gave her an understanding look and suggested a completely new spot, on the other side of the restaurant. The waitress who came to get their orders was confused by the new seating arrangement.

"Hey there Dr. B! You're sitting in an odd place. And this is the second time without your partner. Did something happen between you guys?" The waitress could never know how her simple query broke inside of Brennan's heart. Gordon, realizing she wasn't able to respond, replied instead.

"Hullo there. I'm afraid to say that Agent Booth was involved in a fatal accident almost a week ago, and that's all I am going to say on the matter." He added with a glance in Brennan's direction. She did not want to hear or see the waitress's reaction to the horrible news, and so she excused herself. When she came back, the waitress had left and in her place was her usual Caesar salad. Chef Gordon was munching on a delicious looking ham sandwich. They ate in silence for several minutes. Gordon had learned from his experiences with Brennan that one could not push her to answer. She would answer in her own time, which is exactly what she did then.

"What I meant by never feeling… a certain emotion for someone, is simply that. When I was a teenager, before I was in the system, I used to think about finding that guy. However once I entered the system, I put every thought of that guy out of my head. It was distracting and by that point, I knew I would never deserve a guy like that."

"Care to expound upon your idea of 'that guy'?" Gordon asked in a soft, low tone.

"It was… the guy who could understand me with a simple look. A guy who would always support and protect me, even if it irritated me. I needed someone who would take me as I am, emotional baggage and all. It's hard to find someone who doesn't run away when I tell him what I do for a living…" Brennan's voice trailed off into a deep sigh. "Booth is everything and more. He is… was my most trusted friend."

Gordon placed his hand on top of Brennan's with a comforting touch. She was unused to anyone except Angela and Booth touching her, but she did not retreat from the contact. After collecting his thoughts, Gordon spoke.

"Do you want to know what I think?" Brennan nodded. "I think you need to acknowledge what Booth meant to you, something you just partly did, and you need closure about his abrupt departure from your life. From our many unofficial sessions, I could tell that both of you were more alike than different."

Brennan opened her mouth to disagree but Gordon held up a hand to stop her. "Ah, let me finish. What I mean is, neither of you envisioned yourselves working like you did. Booth, at the beginning, worked alone and preferred to keep it that way. You thought all FBI agents were arrogant sods and refused to associate with them. But look at where you are now. The journey that began during that first case is not over yet. You have both changed a lot, and I'm sure that you're just now realizing that, correct?"

Brennan nodded slowly. Gordon was clearing up the main source of her confusion and despair with his words. She hadn't realized how great a difference there was between the Brennan of today and the Brennan of three years ago. Booth had burst into her life unannounced and unwanted, at least at first. However, he showed her what it meant to connect to real people.

"So," Gordon continued after a brief pause, "now onto the next thing I think you need. Closure. Take a day off this week and simply sit and reflect on the past three years. Bring up memories of funny conversations, arguments, and exciting cases, anything that you did with Booth during your partnership. Allow the memories to surface; don't block them out. As much as I'm sure you want to, you cannot merely forget the past years. You have to work through it and it's going to take a lot of work. But I know that you will come out on the other side stronger for it."

Gordon sensed that Brennan needed some time to process everything he had just presented to her, and so with a quiet, "Call me later and tell me how it goes," he walked out of the Royal Diner, leaving Brennan to her musings.

oOo

"I'm so sorry, Sweets!" Brennan burst into the young psychologist's office thirty minutes late for her appointment. "I was at the diner having lunch with Gordon Gordon and lost track of the time." She sat down and attempted to compose herself as she waited for Sweets to speak.

"You're usually very conscious of the time, aren't you Dr. Brennan. And I remember that you were usually the one to make sure Agent Booth came to our sessions on time. You being late is a very odd occurrence. Why were you with Dr. Gordon before our meeting?"

"My being late is not an odd occurrence, thank you. I am late sometimes, you know. I just prefer to be on time. And the reason I was meeting with _Chef _Gordon," she stressed Gordon's correct appellation, "is because he came to visit me at the lab and invited me to lunch, as friends. I believe I told you that Gordon is retired from the field of psychology."

Sweets steepled his fingers as he listened to Brennan's explanation. He seemed to be dissecting her every sentence. As Booth would say, Sweets was using his 'shrinky mojo' on her right now.

"So, after distancing yourself from your closest friends and colleagues, you accept a lunch invitation from your former psychologist? What was your reasoning behind your agreement?"

"Honestly, there was no logical reason for it. I simply wanted to leave the lab for a while and Gordon provided that opportunity. He caught me… in a moment of weakness, I'll say. And I felt obliged to hear his thoughts on the matter."

"What were you doing in this 'moment of weakness'?" She could tell that Sweets was fighting to keep his voice professional. Normally he would've jumped on her statement like a dog on a cookie.

"I was examining a set of remains of a man who died during World War I and I was musing aloud. I did not hear Gordon approach until he spoke. I had no idea how long he had been listening and I did not ask."

"What were you musing about?"

"Are you just going to ask me question after question?" She asked defensively. She was tired and did not have the luxury of Booth to support her through Sweets' session.

"Well, I am supposed to be evaluating your mental state. You know, checking to make sure you're ready to return to work."

"I have already returned to work, Sweets." Brennan replied stiffly.

"So I heard. What I meant was work with the FBI. Director Hacker has already chosen a new partner for you and you're supposed to meet him after our session, if I approve of your mental state, that is."

Brennan stood angrily and fought to keep her voice steady as she answered. "Excuse me? Have I not made it clear in the past that the only agent I will work is Booth? Just because he's gone does NOT mean that I will suddenly change my mind. I will be refraining from working with the FBI as much as I can. I would much rather stay at the Jeffersonian lab these days."

Far from being startled, Sweets actually looked pleased at Brennan's emphatic response. She wished she could read people like Booth could, and then she might have had an idea about what was going through his mind.

"Are you refusing to work with a new partner because you would feel like you'd be betraying Booth in some way?"

"How can I betray him? Booth is dead. He believed in an afterlife but I do not. Therefore there is absolutely no reason why I would be betraying him. He's gone. He doesn't care what I do anymore." Brennan's voice trembled as she fought to keep tears at bay. Emotions were useless and distracting. She could not afford to give in to hear weakness. Not now. She had to stay strong.

Sweets did not reply immediately. She could see his mind processing her outburst and observing every small detail of her words and fight-or-flight stance she had adopted. She sincerely hoped that she did not ruin her chances of being cleared with her emotional declarations. Sweets stood suddenly and Brennan barely contained her reflexive flinch from the movement.

"Well then, since you are quite adamant in your assessment of your mental functionality, I can pass you through this evaluation with no guilt on my conscience." Brennan sighed in relief but inhaled sharply as he continued to speak. "However, this means that you will have to begin work with a new FBI agent tomorrow. Director Hacker informed me of how well you and Agent Lawrence got along with each other the other day. I believe you will be working with him from this moment onwards. I suggest you be on your best behavior."

Brennan received those words with a mixture of shock and anger. She could barely speak through her indignation. How dare Sweets and Hacker go over her head and decide what would be best for her. She couldn't handle it anymore. She leveled a stony glare in Sweet's direction as she stormed out of his office.

oOo

Calm and rational thought returned to Brennan as she arrived home. She couldn't believe how immaturely and rashly she had acted. It had been a very long time since she had ever slammed a door in someone's face. Or yelled at every poor person who greeted her politely in the FBI building hallways. She collapsed onto her couch, reflecting on the emotional rollercoaster the day had been. What she needed now was a nice hot bath with a cup of wine, but she couldn't find the energy to follow through with the idea. She contemplated calling Angela but decided against it. Ange was already under so much stress; she didn't want to add to her friend's problems.

Feeling a mood for Thai food coming on, Brennan mustered up the energy to drive to the restaurant to pick up her food. Like all the other places she and Booth had frequented, the servers asked her what happened to her 'other half' as they phrased it. Brennan wanted to avoid dredging up the emotions accompanied with the unfortunate news and so simply replied that he was busy that day. She hoped that she would not have to explain further in the future. They would probably react like the waitress in the diner. There would be tears and perhaps a few heartfelt sympathetic remarks. She had never been good with comforting people. In fact, Booth told her to avoid it. Just another of the many things she had learned from him.

Brennan drove home much slower this time, and again collapsed onto her couch but this time with food in her hands. She ate pensively, if that were possible. She planned the next day carefully. She had no idea if and when that Agent Lawrence would call and so wanted to put some work into Limbo before she was called into the field. Because of her odd hours, Brennan had identified more remains than she had in her entire tenure at the lab.

"If this is what happens when friends die, then maybe it should be more frequent so I can focus completely on work," she commented darkly to her mirror as she began her nightly routine. As usual, she dreaded the images her sleep would bring but even the great Temperance needed sleep at some point. She sent up a short prayer for nightmare-free sleep as she burrowed into her covers.

* * *

A/N:

Hey guys! Sorry I haven't updated in almost a week. I had to take a small road trip for college stuff and I haven't had any internet access for the past four days. But, now that I'm back home the chapters will be coming on a regular basis now :) I hope you enjoyed this chapter! This is my longest one yet. Oh and any spelling/grammar mistakes are mine, sorry. Please read and review! It makes me happy xD


	7. Chapter 7: Day 5

A/N 1: Hey guys! Sorry for the lateness of this chapter. I had a serious case of writer's block and could not for the life of me figure out which direction to take with this chapter. So hopefully you'll like what I finally ended up with :) Please read and review! Reviews make me happy

A/N 2: I wanna send a couple shout-outs to Katbonescrazy, who was my first reviewer (thanks so much!), Gally619, who was my second official review and my sister who proof-read this chapter for me. The reviews these lovely people left me made my day :)

* * *

Day Five: Tuesday, a Trip Down Memory Lane

"Brennan." Her voice conveyed her irritation with being woken up by a phone call at 5:40 in the morning. Normally she would already be up but the last night had given her what she wanted: a nightmare-free sleep. She was enjoying it immensely until a body decided to be discovered in a downtown park by a poor runner.

"Morning, Dr. Brennan. It's Agent Lawrence calling to tell you we found a body. It's… well you'll see. From what I've read in Booth's reports, this is your usual type of body. No extra appendages this time." His tone was annoyingly cheerful and it grated on her ears.

"I find myself hard pressed to be excited about first, finding a body and second, being woken up at this dismal time. Surely it could have waited a few more hours?"

"Well I heard that you don't like your crime scene to be compromised in the slightest; you prefer to be first on the scene. So I wanted to sort of protect the scene for you."

She sighed in impatience. "I agree with your point. Text me the address of the park and I'll meet you there."

"Actually, I'm on my way to pick you up now so can you be ready in twenty minutes?"

Brennan, up to this point, was in the process of getting dressed and making breakfast. All her activity ceased the moment Agent Lawrence stopped speaking. "Excuse me?" she replied in a deadly serious tone.

The agent backpedaled furiously. "I mean, yeah I'm sending you the address now and I'll just um see you where the body is." He ended the phone call abruptly. Brennan closed her own phone and barely resisted the urge to throw the device across the room. This is what she hated and did her best to avoid. Condescending agents who believed that, because she was a woman, she could not do anything for herself. How difficult is it to drive to a crime scene? She was insulted that this Lawrence person even offered to pick her up.

Brennan finished her preparations and was on her way to the scene in a record total of fifteen minutes. She wanted to be the first to arrive on the scene because the FBI forensics team was rather incompetent and did not measure up to her standards. Even if they showed up before her, she knew they would not touch anything. The forensics teams had learned very early on in her field work to _never_ disturb anything, not even with a camera. This earned her several degrading comments which she ignored, and had to discourage Booth from taking personal offense.

oOo

The crime scene was in complete chaos when she arrived. Along with the usual forensics teams there were numerous television news casters who were attempting to get an early morning story.

"What are the press doing here? How did they even know about this?" Brennan demanded answers as soon as she crossed under the yellow caution tape.

"I'm sorry Dr. Brennan, we had no control over that." A young scientist replied to her questions.

"Oh there you are! What took you so long?" This time it was Agent Lawrence speaking to her. She had no patience for him and so ignored his greeting.

"Just point me toward the body, please." Brennan was irritated at being dragged out of bed and wanted to get the remains back to the Jeffersonian quickly.

"Oh um, it's over here." Agent Lawrence guided her to a park bench where, underneath the simple structure, lay a decomposed corpse.

"Can I get some light over here?" She had no idea how they expected her to identify a body that was laying in the dark, for she did not yet have the sun for natural illumination of the scene. Lawrence produced a flash light from his coat that he shined onto the body. Brennan immediately began her survey.

"Male, approximately 30-35 years of age and about 6'2 in height. Judging from the rate of decomp, I would estimate the time of death at around five or six days. There are defensive wounds on the right and left distal radius, and several fractures on the ribs and collarbone. The right shoulder is also dislocated." Brennan paused to take a breath and Lawrence immediately filled the space with a question.

"So, do you have cause of death?"

Brennan turned to face him, raising an eyebrow in the process.

"Well, judging by the lack of skull, I would say that decapitation is most likely the cause of death. However, I need to send everything back to the Jeffersonian for further examination."

"I can do that. So," he stared inquisitively at her, "what exactly did you say about John Doe here?"

Brennan's eyes widened with incredulity. "Were you not taking notes as I spoke? Or at least even listening to me?"

"No?" The agent threw her a disarming smile, which would've worked if she had been anyone else.

"What exactly were you doing this whole time?" Her preliminary exam of the body had taken at most five minutes, and Booth took notes the entire time, usually chiming in to ask her for clarification of certain words and phrases.

"Um, well you see, I was um making sure that-"

She cut him off abruptly with a raised hand. "No. I don't care what you were doing." She brushed her knees off as she stood from her kneeling position on the ground. This is precisely the reason why she told Sweets, and Cullen, that she would only work with Booth. She simply did not have the time or patience to break in a new partner. She shuddered at that thought. What if Cullen made them partners? While Agent Lawrence was a far more decent man than Agent Foster, she could not envision herself spending long hours with either.

"Agent Lawrence, I am leaving now. Make sure you send everything, and by everything I mean the entire body, plus skull when you find it, the bench, and several dirt samples from the surrounding area, to the Jeffersonian. My usual team is out of the lab for the time being, however there are other scientists who should be able to assist you in identifying this victim."

"What do you mean others to help me? I'm supposed to be working with you, Dr. Brennan." The agent's voice was coloured with confusion.

"I do not think my words are that hard to understand, agent. I have said in the past that there is only one FBI agent that I will work with, and you are not him. Therefore, I am passing you and this case onto my many assistants at the lab." She began walking to her car, but paused to add one last comment. "Don't worry, they are all very good at what they do. Have fun with the squints." And with that, she loaded up her bags and drove back home to hopefully catch a little more shut-eye.

oOo

6:58… 7:05… 7:11… The clock on her bedside table silently mocked Brennan's attempts at getting back to sleep. She tossed and turned, trying to find a comfortable spot in her bed. Apparently her body decided that she had already gotten enough sleep for this night. Also, it was getting harder to ignore the growing rays of sunlight streaming through her window. She flopped onto her back with a sigh. _What am I going to do today? There are also remains to catalog in Limbo… but I've done that straight for almost a week. I hate to admit it, even to myself, but I'm ready for something different. If only I had a decent agent to go out into the field with. My experiences in the past few days have ruined my enjoyment of it. Or perhaps it wasn't just the field work I enjoyed…_ Brennan abruptly cut off her train of thought. It would do no good for her to wander down the same trail day after day. _Wait a minute, didn't Gordon Gordon mention something about closure?_ She cast her mind to yesterday's lunch and her eidetic memory supplied her with the answer. Gordon Gordon advised her to spend the day remembering her former partner. A sudden feeling of longing welled up within her. She missed Booth. She could admit that, only to herself for now though. _Well then, what better way to spend the day? It's not like I had anything else better to do._ She made up her mind completely when she saw what the clock read- 7:17 am.

oOo

The first place she went was the Royal Diner for breakfast. For the first time since Booth's death, she sat in their usual booth by the window. She ordered her usual breakfast, maple oatmeal with strawberries and it arrived rather quickly. She ate on autopilot as she become lost in memories…

_Booth and Brennan had only been working together for a few months at this point. Booth had become tired of the "squint squad" invading his personal getaway space at Wong Foo's and so Brennan and Angela had gone restaurant shopping, so to speak. They needed a place that was close enough to the Jeffersonian and yet was decent in price. Angela had been driving when Brennan saw it- The Royal Diner. It was walking distance from the Jeffersonian and had great food, so she had heard. From the first lunch Angela and she had there, they were both hooked. _

_That being so, it didn't take long before she dragged Booth to the diner for a meeting during a hard case. They were investigating the death of a young pregnant woman and both agent and anthropologist were on edge from the lack of leads and proper evidence. They were having their usual argument. _

"_Tell me again, why exactly can't I have a gun? I'm a very good shot, you know."_

"_Bones, that doesn't matter. Scientists don't need guns. And plus, I have a gun so you'll be fine."_

"_But what happens if you're not there?"_

"_Not where? I'm sure wherever you would need a gun, I'll be standing right next to you. We're partners now, Bones."_

"_Don't call me that. And I don't like having to rely on you to be my gun."_

"_You'll get used to it, both the nickname and the lack of your own gun. Don't worry." _

Looking back on that particular day, Brennan realized the promise her partner had made to her. He would always be there for her. And he held up that promise… until last week, that is.

_As usual when they were arguing, both parties completely ignored the world around them. During their 'discussion', the waitress had stopped by to take their orders. Booth noticed her first. _

"_Oh hi, sorry about that. We didn't mean to ignore you."_

"_Oh don't worry about that sweetheart. So how long have you two been dating?"_

_Brennan looked aghast at her partner. Why did everyone always assume they were dating? And from her experience, people who were in serious dating relationships did not argue as much as they did. Of course, her friends called it bickering but she didn't see the distinction. _

"_Um, we're not dating. And we'd like to order please." Booth sounded flustered to her ears. He was the only person she could read, and she could tell he was tense and uncomfortable with the waitress's assumption. _

"_Oh I'm so sorry," the waitress blushed as she replied. She took their orders and the rest of the lunch progressed smoothly… as smoothly as lunch between her and Booth could at least. _

Brennan smiled fondly as she remembered their first lunch at the diner. Who knew they would spend so much time here? Certainly not herself. She glanced down to see that she had finished her oatmeal while she had been immersed in her memories. Not quite ready to leave, she called a waiter over and ordered a cup of coffee, bringing up even more memories as she spoke.

_Almost two years into her partnership with Booth and they were still meeting at the Royal Diner. Things had changed since their first cases together. They had endured so much in those short two years… if you were to compare the old-Booth and Brennan to the current one, you would think they were different people. They understood each other, in the deepest way sometimes. To their therapist, Dr. Sweet's chagrin, they had mastered the art of silent communication. She no longer thought of her partnership as a burden. Booth had become her best friend. _

_The day was their usual. Booth picked her up on his way into work and dropped her off at the lab with a promise to pick her up for lunch in a few hours. Even though she didn't (and still wouldn't) admit it, she liked that Booth truly cared about her well being. As promised, he came by several hours later at lunch time. In the two years they had moved from angry disagreements to lively banter. They sat in their normal window seat and the diner as the server brought their food. As soon as Booth was served his fries, Brennan's hand sneaked across the table to steal one. He smacked her hand away before she grab it though. _

"_Get your own fries, Bones! These are mine." Booth possessively drew his plate nearer his body as his eyes twinkled at her. _

"_Somehow I feel like they would not taste the same if I ordered my own. Also, I don't want that many. I simply want a few and you provide the perfect opportunity." Brennan's own eyes glimmered with a teasing undercurrent. Instead of verbally replying like she expected, Booth simply stared back. This was her first experience with the Look. She never noticed it during, only afterward. It was this moment when the world seemed to fade away and the only other person with her was her partner. It was a strange feeling, one she could not rationalize. Booth seemed to telepathically project his feelings onto her and somehow, she knew exactly what he was saying, even though he wasn't speaking. This moment in particular stood out in Brennan's mind because of what came next. _

"_Agent Booth, Dr. Brennan! What are you guys doing here?"_

_Booth and Brennan jumped at the unexpected interruption. Brennan looked up to see Sweets, their therapist. Her eyes widened in surprise. They had never seen each other outside of the FBI building… Why, of all times, would he show up now? She glanced at her partner and saw the same questions in his eyes. _

"_Sweets, what are you doing here?" Booth was irritated, she could tell. On some lever, she realized she was feeling the same way, although she could not find a reason for it. _

"_I'm here for lunch, duh. I've heard good things about this place and from our sessions, I could tell you guys spend a lot of time here. I was right." Sweets invited himself to sit next to Brennan and ordered his own lunch. _

"_Hey Bones, why'd you bring along your little brother? This was 'us' time." Booth spoke with a teasing and slightly condescending tone. At first, she was confused because Sweets was not her brother, but then she understood his meaning and retorted, "Well it certainly wasn't me that invited him. But now that he's here I guess we'll have to suffer through this together." She paused, and then added for a greater effect, "Don't worry, I'll make it up to you." She said with a wink at the end. Booth choked on the fry he had just eaten. She guessed he was surprised that she could flirt. _

"_That's interesting." Sweets, the unwanted lunch guest spoke up. Immediately Booth shot him down. _

"_No, no no. You're not here to comment and do your little shrinky mojo stuff on us. This," he gestured around at the diner, "is not your office. We," here he gestured at himself and Brennan, "are not in a session right now. This is strictly partner stuff."_

_Brennan remembered clearly how she felt at Booth's words. While not usually appreciative of Booth's Alpha-male tendencies, she felt warmth blossom in her chest from Booth's defense. She liked Sweets, but he was right; they weren't in a session and she did not want to process Sweets' many insights into their relationship. _

… _They were laughing, celebrating the success of 'Tony and Roxy', their impromptu undercover identities in Las Vegas…_

… _The feeling of Booth's arms as he held her tightly after she and Hodgins blew their way out of her car. She never told him she could feel his tears splashing against her hair…_

…_The sudden and blessed feeling of relief and safety when Booth burst into the warehouse to save her from Kenton…_

… _The many times during their therapy sessions when they 'closed ranks' and together, defended each other from Sweets' inquiries… _

… _Booth's attempts to convince her to eat a bite of his apple pie… _

… _Angela's face the first time Booth managed to drag Brennan out of the lab precisely at dinner time…_

…_Booth leaning in so close she could feel his breath, and presenting her with Jasper, the pig…_

… _A diving contest between her and Parker, with Booth acting as official judge…_

Oh God. Parker. Brennan scolded herself for forgetting about the most important person in Booth's life. She stood abruptly from her seat in the diner and rushed out of the door. Did he know what happened to his father? If he did, how was he coping? Children respond strongly to grief, she knew and she hoped Rebecca could handle him. As she walked to her car, she pulled out her phone to call Rebecca to check up on the family, but decided against it as an idea slowly formed in her mind. She knew that Rebecca relied both on her job and the child support Booth paid every month. How could she properly care for Parker with a severely reduced income? Brennan paused as she settled into the driver's seat. Who could she call for this? She might have some contacts on her office computer. Armed with a mission, Brennan drove madly to the Jeffersonian. She ran inside quickly, almost knocking over several technicians and assistants in her haste. She slid into her chair and started up her computer. Brennan scrolled through the long and various list of contacts, searching for one in particular. There! Olivia Hastings, a lawyer specializing in wills and trust funds. Brennan punched the number into her phone and waited for someone to pick up.

oOo

"Dr. Brennan? Ms. Hastings will see you now."

Brennan stood at the sound of her name and hurried through the open office doors. She had met the lawyer on one of her many flights and became acquaintances. Before today, she had no need to employ Ms. Hasting's services but she was so glad she decided to keep the number for so long.

"Hi there Ms. Hastings. I'm so glad you were able to see me today. Sorry for the last minute notice."

"Oh it's no problem. You were lucky. My schedule was flexible."

Olivia Hastings was the stereotypical female lawyer. She was tall, leggy with cropped red hair that complemented her pale complexion. The kind of woman Booth dated, Brennan thought idly as she sat down.

"So what can I do for you?"

"Well I would like to set up a trust fund for my…" here she faltered. Should she say former partner? Dead partner? Realizing it didn't really matter, she continued. "For a friend's son. Because of his home situation, I doubt he will have sufficient funds when he begins to prepare for college. I would like to change that, if I can."

"Yeah that's definitely possible. And you must either love your friend or the son a lot to do this." Ms. Hastings smiled.

Brennan faltered before replying, "Yes. I love both of them. The friend is my partner. He… passed away last week and he helped to provide for his son because he was not married to the mother."

"Ah I see. A lot of our business consists of single parents or step-parents. It's so great to see you doing this. I'm sure if your partner could see you, he'd be proud."

Brennan hoped the same, even though she knew rationally that Booth was dead and therefore could not know what was going on. However, she did not verbally contradict the lawyer. She simply waited patiently for Ms. Hastings to draw up the correct forms. As she waited, she contemplated the amount she should put into the fund. What college would Parker attend? Would he carry on to graduate school? How expensive were colleges today? She voiced these thoughts aloud for advice.

"Well it depends," Ms. Hastings replied. "Most parents make regular deposits until the funds are needed." She peered at Dr. Brennan. "However, I have a feeling that you want to deposit a set amount and let it accumulate interest. Am I right?"

"Yes, you are right. I would much rather do that than make regular deposits. Parker, the son, is only seven years old. I will add more when he nears the college age."

"I think that's a good idea. So now to determine a good amount." She paused. "Did you have a limit?"

Brennan shook her head. She had just gotten a check from her publisher for her second book and was tempted to place the entire thing in the fund.

"No limit then. How does $50,000 sound? Is that a decent amount?"

"Actually, I would like to put this entire check into the fund. Is that alright?" Brennan pulled the check out of her bag and slid it across to the other woman who gasped when she saw the figures.

"The entire thing? Are you sure?"

"Quite. I believe this to be a good amount for Parker. I care for him deeply and want to ensure him the best education that I can."

"Well he could go to the best college three times over for this amount! Are you related to him in any way? Because I've never seen biological parents begin a fund this big."

Brennan blushed as she replied, "No, we're not related. I think of him as sort of a surrogate son, though. He's the closest I'll ever be to a biological one."

"I'm very impressed with the depth of your love for him. I know he'll appreciate this a lot when the time comes."

Brennan and Ms. Hastings spent the next two hours hashing out the specifics of the fund. Brennan left the building feeling satisfied with her work for the day. This was much better than the case she had been dragged out into the field for. She just changed Parker's life, and he didn't even know it. She returned to the idea of calling Rebecca to inform her of the fund, but decided against it for now. She still did not know if Rebecca and Parker knew about Booth. She sincerely hoped however, that the FBI had passed the information to them.

Brennan drove home slowly, not bothering to stop by the lab. Her team and boss were out for the week, and so no one there would miss her absence. On a sudden impulse, she stopped to pick up Thai food. She wasn't in the mood for cooking and had just eaten at the diner for breakfast. Brennan sat on her couch, munching on the tasty take-out. Just the smell of the meal brought back memories. After just a year into their partnership, Booth had begun the habit of showing on her doorstep bearing Thai food. Usually it was after an especially tough case the team had solved. The first time he did that, he claimed that he saw her lights on from the road. However, Brennan knew for a fact that her windows could not be seen from the street; it was one reason she picked this particular apartment. She let her partner in though, and thus a habit was born. Some nights he would visit her, and others she would be the one knocking at midnight or later. When they accidentally let slip to Sweets of their late visits, he drew an odd conclusion. He claimed they were in a surrogate relationship, which explained Booth's jealousy whenever she dated. But she didn't honestly believe Sweets, and neither did Booth. Fast-forward a year and some months though, and Brennan was having a hard time believing they actually were 'just partners'. The term didn't describe their true relationship very well. She sighed as she finished eating and began preparing for bed. Well, if they _were_ in a so-called surrogate relationship, then the logical action would be to move on. Right?


	8. Chapter 8: Day 6

A/N: Hey guys! Again, I apologize for the lateness of this chapter. I knew the direction I wanted to go, but I couldn't find the rights words to keep Brennan in character. So I'm pretty sure Bren is going to seem kinda OOC. Please let me know what you think! Reviews makes me happy :)

A/N2: I wanna thank everyone who has either reviewed/subscribed to the story. I do a little happy dance in my head every time I get the notification xD

* * *

Day 6: Wednesday, the day for irrational thinking

Grief. Some say it is an emotion; others, an action. Psychologists and scientific experts have identified five stages of it: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. If Brennan believed in psychology, she would say she is firmly rooted in the second stage- anger. Anger at what? Well, that's the question. Brennan herself did not know. Perhaps it was because Booth promised to never abandon her, and yet he did. Or perhaps her anger was directed at the doctors and medical staff present when the EMT's transported Booth to the hospital. While not a medical doctor, Brennan knew life threatening injuries when she saw them. Booth's life was not threatened by his injury. Or maybe… just maybe, it was because Brennan, for one moment in her life, was wrong.

She was not arrogant. She knew she was a genius, and that even genii make mistakes and errors. However, the biggest errors she has made in her career have to been to wrongly identify or catalog remains. And in those few instances, the remains belonged to a war victim from Limbo, and so had no family desperately waiting for news. This mistake was different though. This one, unlike the others she had made, would haunt her the rest of her life.

Brennan angrily replaced a set of remains in a box to be carried back to Limbo. For some reason the bones were silent today. No matter how hard she stared, prodded, or rotated the bones, she simply could not find her answers. Frustrated, she glanced at her watch. It read 11am. She had been down in Limbo since 6 that morning- the result of another sleepless night. Brennan closed her eyes and attempted to calm herself. She needed something to happen in her life. Something had to change. Dr. Saroyan and the rest of the main Jeffersonian team had returned to work this morning.

One by one, they had all visited her and offered their 'sincerest condolences and sympathies'. She appreciated the sentiment but did not want to deal with the feelings brought on by them. And so without seeming rude, she hid herself in Limbo for the morning. For the few minutes she was upstairs greeting her team, she could tell something was different. It was the way they interacted with her, or while she was around. It was all very… edgy, stiff even. But what did she know. Booth was the people person and Brennan was known for her social awkwardness. She briefly considered consulting Angela about the issue but she didn't think it would bring about the desired results.

"Hey Sweetie."

Speak of the demon. It seemed like her thoughts summoned her best friend against her wishes.

"Hey Angela." In an attempt to discourage Angela from starting a conversation, she refocused on the bones she was repackaging.

"Sweetie look at me. I have something to tell you."

While not being able to read people well, Brennan could tell when someone was on the verge of tears. Angela's voice was thick and as she looked at her friend, she could see her eyes were glassy.

"What's wrong?"

"They figured I should be the one to tell you… We knew you wouldn't kill me or anything." Angela let out a watery chuckle that sounded more like a gargle to Brennan's ears.

"Why would I kill you? What do you have to tell me?" Against her will, Brennan was beginning to feel anxious. She has had enough bad news to last her for awhile and was not anticipating anymore.

"Well you see…" Angela paused, searching for the right words. "Booth's funeral is next Friday and they need you to settle his will and final affairs because you were his partner and he chose you to be the executor of his estate and all that." She said this very fast and it forced Brennan to slow her words down mentally before she understood what her friend was saying. Brennan opened her mouth to say something but no sound emerged. What would she say? What _could _she say? Why did he choose me for that position? Why is his funeral so long after his death? She knew Angela didn't have the answers to those questions so she simply responded with an okay and turned back to her work. Angela did not appreciate her lack of reaction, however.

"Okay? That's all you say." Angela's tears dried as indignation won out over sadness. "I just told you that your best friend's funeral is next week and you were the unfortunate person chosen to carry out his will, and all you say is okay? Brennan, sweetie I know you're scary good at compartmentalizing or whatever, but I need some kinda reaction from you."

"I don't know what that means." Usually when she said this, Brennan truly did not understand what was going on. However this was one time when she was purposely being obtuse. And of course, Angela picked that up as well.

"Brennan don't play dumb with me. We both know that you know what that means. It means that you're going to have to leave the lab longer than a few hours at night to go home. And don't try to argue with me." For Brennan was about to respond to Angela's words but was silenced by a hand in her face. "Now please just listen to me. I can't imagine what you're going through. But remember that Booth was my friend too. He was everyone's friend and so everyone is missing him. It's not just you, you know."

"Angela, I know this. I don't know why you're reminding me of Booth's role-"

Angela cut her off. "I'm reminding you because you're shutting everyone out. Like you were before Booth came along. We" she gestured between her and Brennan, "were friends but you most definitely were not friends with Hodgins and Zack."

It was strange to hear such an observation now. Brennan knew that she, Hodgins and Zack were nothing more than colleagues until they began working on homicide cases, but it seemed more… real to hear someone else say the same thing. Logically, she knew it was true, spoken aloud or not but logic was begin to fade in importance lately.

"I understand that, Ange. I really do. And I'm…" Brennan never apologized. Ever. Or so she thought at least. "I did not mean to shut you out. You know you are my best friend and you've done a lot for me the past week."

"Yeah well I could be doing more," Angela muttered underneath her breath. Brennan heard the comment but chose not to comment. A strong sense of exposure and vulnerability overwhelmed Brennan suddenly and she struggled to process it. Angela noticed something was wrong and asked about it.

"It's nothing. I'm just tired. I haven't been sleeping well." More like not at all, she added silently. However she knew her limits. She would be fine for at least another day or two, even if she only slept for two hours both nights.

"Well just call me if you need anything, kay?"

"Yeah I will. Thanks Ange."

"No problemo. Now then, you're coming with me!" Angela abruptly grabbed Brennan's arm and began dragging her up the steps to the main lab area.

"Where are we going? Angela! Let me go. Where are you going?"

Angela simply ignored the irate doctor in her grasp and proceeded to guide Brennan to her office where she picked up her friend's purse and then guided her to the car.

"Must I ask again?"

"Nope. I'm taking you to lunch. Because it's 12 o'clock and that's lunch time for normal people."

"But I'm not hungry Ange. I had a large breakfast."

Brennan's stomach betrayed her though. It growled and grumbled loudly as Angela pulled out of the parking lot.

"Not hungry? Yeah right sweetie."

oOo

Lunch with Angela was good for Brennan. She took Bren to a new restaurant in town; somehow she knew Brennan needed a change in her routine. The restaurant was vegetarian in nature and was surprisingly delicious. Once back at the Jeffersonian, Brennan decided to work up in her office. She was beginning to feel trapped down in Limbo all by herself. She needed a reminder that she wasn't alone- both in her grief and in her life. That was another thing Angela reminded her of.

"Dr. Brennan?"

She looked up to see Zach standing her doorway.

"Hey Zach. What is it?"

"Well I have an identity for the body you and Agent Lawrence brought in the other day."

"You do? I thought I told the other assistants to work on that…"

"Well you did. However, as I was supervising them, I realized that their techniques were incorrect and as a result, they were compromising the evidence."

"Ah I see. I'm glad you took over, then. The last thing we need right now is an incompetent forensic team. That's what the FBI is for." She and Zach shared a chuckle at the FBI's expense.

"Anyway, I wanted to give you the victim's file." He walked over to her desk and laid a file on it.

"Thanks a lot. I'll take a look at it." She immediately picked up the file and began perusing it. Even though she did not enjoy reading the victim's file, right now she was grateful for the interruption. She had spent the last two hours staring at her computer screen. She had attempted to write the next chapter in her novel but was suffering from a severe case of writer's block. Kathy and Andy had just hit a dead-end in their current case. Normally at this point, the investigating duo would somehow end up in bed (or other acceptable surface). However, writing them into that particular situation didn't seem… right.

Brennan suddenly realized she had been staring at the file for almost ten minutes without reading one word of it. She couldn't work like this. Her productivity levels were quite high the last few days but something had changed. Everything was changing, it seemed like. Brennan strongly disliked change. Anthropologically speaking, societies and cultural groups can't survive without evolving. Doesn't mean she has to be pleased by it. But then again… if everyone else was changing, why shouldn't she? Surely, Brennan of all people deserved to change, right? She had read that people who experience severe grief or trauma often make irrational decisions that endanger their life. Was that the case here? No, no of course not. Brennan never acted irrationally. She was logical to a fault. Which is how she convinced herself that going out to a bar and finding someone was a good idea. She believed Angela would approve.

oOo

Three hours, one shower, and five changes of clothes later, Brennan found herself walking into a bar on the outskirts of the D.C area. It was a slightly seedy looking place, the neon sign glowed with the words _The Elbow Room_. It was rather far from her usual haunts, but she needed change. As she walked in, she was surprised to see that the rundown appearance was only on the outside of the building. While it couldn't rival _The Founding Father's_, it wasn't near as bad as she had expected. Brennan strode confidently to the bar and chose a seat near the center.

"What'll it be, lady?"

The bartender was a huge man with a gruff-looking beard.

"An apple martini, please." He simply grunted in reply and turned to begin fixing the drink. Usually when she and Booth went out for drinks, she would drink beer or a glass of wine. She was never one for the fruity drinks such as martinis. However, she was feeling daring tonight. She wanted to make a statement. To whom, she wasn't sure yet.

"Hey there."

A smooth-sounding voice drifted to her ears. She turned to find the source of the words and found herself staring into the brightest green eyes she had ever seen. The gorgeous eyes belonged to a man with _very_ symmetrically-pleasing features. Angela would've called him hot and said he oozed sex appeal. Before tonight, Brennan hadn't known what the phrase meant but know she understand it completely.

"Hello." Her voice trembled slightly, which was strange for her.

"What's your name?"

"Temperance. And yours?" Oh yes, her confidence and unwavering voice was back. Somewhere in the back of her mind was a little voice yelling at her, saying something was wrong but Brennan didn't listen. She focused on the man in front of her, not on the one she had so recently lost.

"Matthew, but you can call me Matt." He ended his sentence with a wink that set Brennan's nerve endings tingling. She spent several enjoyable hours talking and occasionally dancing with Matt. She never had much opportunity in the to truly interact with men because Booth was always around being an overprotective Alpha-male. Although she would admit that sometimes she appreciated interventions.

The sound of her cell phone ringing turned her attention away from her thoughts and dancing partner. By this time, Brennan was close to being completely intoxicated. The only person she would allow herself to be drunk with was Booth, because she trusted him implicitly. But Matt seemed like a rather trustworthy guy, so she let her guard down for the night.

"Hello?" Her voice was a drunken slur and surprised the voice on the other line.

"Brennan, sweetie? What? Are you drunk?"

"Me? Noooo of course I'm not drunk. I believe I am-" she hiccuped, "mildly intoxicated, at the most. Don't worry Ange."

"Sweetie, whenever you tell me not to worry, that's when I worry the most because I know you're doing something dumb and dangerous."

"This… isn't… dangerous." Words were beginning to become hard to pronounce for Brennan. She supposed she had more drinks than she had realized.

"Brennan, where are you? I'm coming to pick you up right now." In the background, she heard the sound of keys jingling. She giggled.

"Oh Angela, you don't have to. I found someone! He'll take me home, won't you Matt?" The last part she directed at the man who standing uncomfortably close to her.

"Yeah that's right, Angela, I think your name is. I'll take good care of your lady friend here. Don't you worry." Matt snatched the phone away from Brennan's hands and ended the call. "So how about we go somewhere quieter? I did say I'd take care of you, you know." His face curved into a seductive smile.

Brennan was still in the thrall of her drunken haze, and mindlessly agreed to his suggestion. In spite of her high intoxication levels, as soon as they stepped outside the bar into the cool, night air, she began to sober up. Sober enough to realize she was about to break one of her cardinal rules: Never go home with a guy she meets at a bar. She jerked herself out from the arm he had over her shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Matt but I can't go home with you. I just remembered a previous engagement that is of utmost importance."

"An important engagement at-" he paused to check his watch, "three am in the morning? Yeah right." He turned to face her and grabbed both her hands in his. "Please, Temperance just come home with me. I can tell that you need this. I can be what you need. You gotta let me try."

Brennan experienced a moment of absolute confusion and indecision. Isn't this the reason she came out to the bar? To find someone who could make her forget. And now that she found a potentially compatible mate, she was beginning to doubt herself. She never doubted herself. But right now… As Booth would say, her gut was telling her something was not right in this situation. She needed to get out, now!

"Again, I'm really sorry Matt but I really must leave." She was completely sober; the adrenaline and cool air served as perfect sobering devices. She turned her back slightly to Matt as she searched for a taxi. Now she wished she had driven.

"Temperance." Matt's voice had lost all traces of the smooth and seductive tone he had used all night. "You led me on, all night. Danced with me, drank with me, and now you're backing out? Oh no." His voice was slowly raising in volume as he spoke.

"I don't appreciate your yelling at me. I apologize for leading you on. Now leave me alone before I'm forced to hurt you." Her stance turned defensive. For a few seconds, she really believed she would have to fight her way home. However, several couples stumbled out of the bar door as she finished talking. Matt, choosing not to create a scene and possible get arrested, sharply turned away and strode back into the bar. Brennan sighed in relief. Well then. How was she going to get home? The magnitude of her actions suddenly crashed down on her. In hindsight, her actions were incredibly irrational and idiotic. Why did she think that going to a bar would take the pain in her chest away? And who know the heart, which scientifically was a simple muscle, could hurt so much? She collapsed in tears in the parking lot.

After an indefinite amount of time, Brennan's lachrymal ducts finally stopped producing moisture. She wiped her face, pulled out her cell phone and called a cab. As soon as it arrived, she jumped into the backseat, calling out a familiar address. The cab driver began to drive. It wasn't until she heard a quiet voice say , "Excuse me, miss. We're at your destination," that she realized what address she had spoken. She had arrived at Booth's apartment. Angry at herself but not wanting to stay in the cab for any longer, she paid the driver and slowly climbed out of the vehicle. She wondered what Sweets would say if she told him the events of this night. Feeling a headache begin, she decided she didn't want to know.

She walked slowly up the stairs to her partner's apartment. As she unlocked the door, she irrationally believed she would see Booth walk out of his bedroom, complaining about the lateness of the visit, or that she should have brought Thai with her. She took a deep breath in an attempt to control the sudden and strong influx of emotions, but it was no use. The tears came anyway. In the back of her mind, she knew why she had come here. She needed to feel his presence. For just one night, she needed to put all logical thought out of her mind. She stumbled to Booth's bedroom and fell onto the bed. She buried her head in his pillow and breathed in his scent. For some unfathomable reason, the action comforted her. If she kept her eyes closed tight enough, maybe… just maybe, she could pretend that her partner was still here. Booth had promised to never betray or abandon her. But in the end, everyone left Brennan, whether she liked it or not. It was the only thing she believed she deserved. The only constant in life.


End file.
